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Feeling challenged by life

8/1/2015

9 Comments

 
Do you sometimes feel really challenged by life?  I do.  I have many times in my life.  Especially in my adult life.  Sometimes I feel like i am hanging by spider webs that are ready to give way, sometimes I feel like i am going to be plowed over by a tidal wave.  

I am a faithful optimistic person .  But sometimes i lose my ground. I get caught up with the turbulence and the storms of the world around me.  I feel that the "responsibility of life" overcomes me.  I feel small and scared.  

Can i carry on?  Can i hold up?  Can i stay the course? Can my loved ones do it without me?  Why do i bother ?  

I imagine that if i can stay present and allow myself to feel this vulnerability that it will pass and it always does.

I stand strong every day and do what i need to do.  I care for people.    I am present as they face dying, life, pain and suffering, joy and celebration.  It is the joy of my career,  I am blessed to have this life as a doctor where people entrust me and share with me.  But there are moments where I feel vulnerable.  

Sometimes . I want the universe to hang a large net and to catch me as i fall.  I have needs.  Sometimes they are not met.  I can not blame anyone for that.  It is what it is..... 

Today...

Ok so I wrote that about a month ago.  Was not going to share it but it was how i felt at the time.  Brene Brown says " courage is born out of vulnerability not strength".  I am not always great at sharing my weak moments.  I decided that this saved draft should be shared......   

Ok so to change gears....  

So I recently did my first every art festival at the Carbondale mountain festival. What a beautiful place to spend a weekend in July.  It was alot of work but overall was a great success.  

An interesting observation that I made.  I had three 4 year old girls come into my tent.  They all three were immediately drawn to the painting that I call   Sands of Turmeric.    They went directly to that painting and all asked me to tell the story.  I found this amazingly fascinating.  This was a painting inspired by Robi Chakraborty   Photographer extraordinaire.  He lives in Minnesota but he is from India and the majority of his photography is from India.  This was a girl that he photographed in the desert of Rajasthan ,  With his permission, I painted this painting.  I love this painting but i am left with the question.  What is it about four year old girls ?  I love that it reaches them,  just leaves me with a question mark...

Thank you for taking the time to read this.  
Picture
9 Comments
Ardith Goodwin link
8/3/2015 12:52:48 pm

4 year old girls are connected to beauty, imagination, and story in an instinctive way and they are drawn to the visuals in their world that remind them of that. Your piece is powerful, she is beautiful, and she lends herself to wanting to know the story. Their beautiful imaginations and hearts knew that. :) So touched that you share your journey of struggle and strength. Makes you quite real and beautiful and inspiring.

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Stacia baket link
8/3/2015 01:12:59 pm

Ardith. Thank you . This message touches me deeply .

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Sheri Fisher link
8/3/2015 01:05:16 pm

Stacia -- Your writing is as beautiful as is your painting. I love Brene' Brown and her perspective of vulnerability and strength. Thank you for sharing your thoughts, talents, heart and soul. Namaste!

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Stacia link
8/3/2015 01:16:40 pm

Sheri, thank you for sharing the same with me . Hopefully will see you Thursday am !! Gonna miss you when your gone

Reply
Kathleen
8/4/2015 12:38:24 am

Stacia,
Just wanted to tell you I LOVE this painting. It, like all of your paintings, makes me sit, think and imagine. Are you doing copies of this?

Reply
stacia baker link
8/4/2015 05:00:40 am

Yes this painting is already available as prints. The original is 24 x 30 and would be 75 dollars. a 16 x 20 would be 60. Let me know if you would like one.

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Julie
8/4/2015 01:27:05 am

Stacia your honesty makes me love you all the more if that is possible. You have found such a healthy way to express your good times and bad times. The difficult times are our biggest lessons and growth periods. If only we could realize that in the moments we are most frightened. What a journey this LeFebvre is and you make my journey more beautiful xoxo sister

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Lisa Guerette
8/4/2015 02:56:47 am

As always, you amaze and inspire me. Today, your words are the salve my soul needed. To know that another human from time to time has these same crippling inner thoughts, feelings, doubts and unwavering persistence to make the small little piece of the world that we, for but a short time occupy, a better and brighter place, despite personal disappointments, whether they be internal or from an external source helps to calm the heart, mind, spirit and soul. I applaud your bravery in sharing. I love you my dear friend. xo

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Eorr link
10/23/2023 05:24:38 pm

Nice blog you havee

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